Smile every day-2018-63

Posted by loong on 2018/09/13 in 英语段子 |

When Everyone Had Diaries

Remember when everyone had diaries and got mad when someone read them?
Now they put everything on Facebook and get mad when they don’t!

Helpful Grandaugher

My Granddaughter bought me one of those fancy do everything cell phones for my birthday. She said she’d come over on the weekend and show me how to use it.
The bad thing is I spilled some water on it and feeling horrible I called her up and told her what happened. She told me take out the battery, take out that card thingy dingy and put the phone in rice and leave it sealed in Tupperware over night.
I told her I’d call her back the minute I did all of that. When I called her back she asked what took to long. I told her that I do things the old fashioned way, I don’t use that minute rice stuff and it took me twenty five minutes to cook the rice. She asked if I had submerged it in the rice yet and I told her that I had.
She paused for a moment and said, the rice trick doesn’t always work. I’m sure it’s going to work fine, I call her tomorrow after I get all of that sticky rice off of it tell her the good news.

How to Say No to Smoking

I discussed peer pressure and cigarettes with my 12-year-old daughter. Having struggled for years to quit, I described how I had started smoking to “be cool”.
As I outlined the arguments kids might make to tempt her to try it, she stopped me mid-lecture, saying, “Hey, I’ll just tell them my mom smokes. How cool can it be?”
Blog of Loong

The Slowest in the Herd

As the herd of cows were traveling, one of them was falling behind.
She shouted out to the others that she could not run any faster.
She shouted, “Slow down, my calves are killing me!”

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