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品笑话学英语-2019-202

Posted by loong on 2019/01/31 in 英语段子 |

Mom Doesn’t Need Makeup

Rushing to get to the movies, my husband and I told the kids we had to leave “right now” — at which point our teenage daughter headed for the bathroom to apply makeup. Her dad yelled for her to get in the car immediately, and headed for the garage grumbling.
On the way to the multiplex my husband glanced in the rearview mirror and caught our teen applying lipstick and blush, which produced the predictable lecture. “Look at your mom,” he said. “She didn’t put on any makeup just to go sit in a dark movie theater.”
From the back I heard, “Yeah, but Mom doesn’t need makeup.” My heart swelling with the compliment, I turned back to thank this sweet, wonderful daughter of mine just as she continued, “Nobody looks at her.”
 
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No Cheating

In a class room exam, John was peeping into the answer sheet of his neighbor.
The teacher shouted, “No cheating John!”
John replied, “I am not cheating. I am copying. There is a difference!”
 
品英语笑话,轻松休闲学英语。
Clean Dirty Joke

You wanna hear a dirty joke?
A boy fell in a mud puddle.
You wanna hear a clean joke?
He took a bath.
 
Blog of Loong
好玩又长知识,总有你喜欢的!
Benchwarmer

It was the first day of basketball practice at Wingate high school in Brooklyn, N.Y. Coach Jack Kaminer handed a ball to each player.
“Fellas,” he said, “I want you to practice shooting from the spots you might expect to be in during the game.”
The No. 12 sub immediately sat down at the end of the bench and began launching the ball toward the basket.
 
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