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品笑话学英语-2018-102

Posted by loong on 2018/10/22 in 英语段子 |

Late Night Visitor

If you are dating someone who only visits and annoys you at night…
… then you must be dating a Mosquito.

Twin Beds

An older couple was asking for a room with a king, queen or double bed. The clerk apologized and said that the only rooms available had twin beds.
Disappointed, the man remarked, “I don’t know. We’ve been sharing the same bed for 44 years.”
“Could you possibly put them close together?” the wife asked.
Several people nearby smiled, and someone commented, “How romantic.”
Then the woman finished her request with, “Because if he snores, I want him close enough to be able to elbow him.”
 
品英语笑话,轻松休闲学英语。

Bold Thief

A man went camping in a state park. Before leaving his car to go hiking he left a note on the dashboard saying, “The stereo is broke.”
He did this to deter thieves from breaking into his older model car. When returning from his hike the man noticed his car window was broken and the stereo was cut from the dashboard.
A note was left by the thief saying, “We’ll fix it.”
 
Blog of Loong
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The Importance of Punctuation

I’m not the easiest guy in the world to get along with. So when our anniversary rolled around, I wanted my wife to know how much I appreciated her tolerating me for the past 20 years. I ordered flowers and told the florist to enclose a card that read, ‘Thanks for putting up with me so long.’
When my wife got the delivery, she called me at work.
“Just where do you think you going?” she asked.
“What do you mean?” I said.
She read the card aloud as the florist had written it: “Thanks for putting up with me. So long.”
 
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